Cheater

It’s about 2AM in the morning and I can feel a presence in the room. My stomach wrestles with itself, my eyes are now wide open and I am once again reminded of my loss. I thought that I was fine. I thought that I had accepted what had happened. I thought that I could get onto my high horse and ride off into the future. I was wrong!

Did you know that it is estimated that one in seven newlyweds will cheat within their first year of marriage?

The problem with cheating is that everyone has their own definition of what being 'unfaithful' actually means. To some it’s seeing their boyfriend flirting with another woman at a bar and to others it’s their drunken girlfriend dancing with another man. People have their own set of standards towards what behaviour constitutes towards cheating. One of my views on cheating is that if you are pursuing another relationship while you’re already in one then you are a cheater!

When this happens, there is no white lie that can make you look pure in the naked light of day, no excuse that will make me look like the big bad wolf and no amount of apologies that will compensate for the fact that I was cheated on.

When I was grieving the loss of my relationship with my ex, I realised that I was no longer grieving for the loss of him in my life. Instead, I was devastated for the fact that I had been deceived. I thought I knew myself and I thought that I knew him. He would always be the first to talk about trust and the first to put down his ex at any given opportunity. 

Reflecting on the situation now, I realise that a lot of his behaviour was simply smoke and mirrors to hide his devious plans. All his attempts to demonise his ex were to hide his present feelings for her and all his talk of ‘trust’ was simply to ensure that I followed his game plan.

He told some fabulous lies, ones that once haunted me at night.